since we got back to work from holy week, things have been no less than hellishly busy. and this morning, im really feeling it take a toll on me. even as i write this, i have to concentrate on breathing and fighting the tremors in my hands. how can anyone be under this much stress on a saturday morning?!
i feel SO overwhelmed and confused with things. its like my system is just overloaded... and i think its mostly because of the fatigue building up. i feel like i lost capability to do anything.... as in di na ako maka-isip. like im at my breaking point and i dont know what to do anymore.
id hate to think that other people in the office may be going through a similar thing... coz thats just not good.
the creatives have been working non-stop (literally). one presentaiton after (often one on top of another)... meeting deadlines just in the nick of time. and there's nothing we can do but just go through the motion and hope we get past this phase.
the accounts, the default "blame me" persons. always feeling guilty that we have to dump so much work on the creatives but really cant do much most of the time. i personally feel like im fighting to stay afloat.
i guess there's nothing more to do than to JUST KEEP SWIMMING. tired or not, i have to keep swimming to survive.. and hopefully the end will have for me a beautiful paradise island where i can rest and be carefree.
Saturday, April 28
Monday, April 23
hot in the city
its been brutally HOT. im sure everyone in manila will agree. its been so hot that im actually looking forward to being in the office tomorrow to get out of the heat. hahaha.
i guess it wouldnt be as bad if i got to go and enjoy the heat at the beach. was invited to go to galera for mon and ralph's birthday... but i had medical tests schedules over the weekend. BUT! as fate would have it, the iCare cardiologist had an emergency saturday morning and didnt see anyone for consultation. sayang. i had to cancel the tests. I COULD HAVE SPENT THE UBER HOT WEEKEND IN GALERA!!!
o well.. no point in being a brat about it. :p
i guess it wouldnt be as bad if i got to go and enjoy the heat at the beach. was invited to go to galera for mon and ralph's birthday... but i had medical tests schedules over the weekend. BUT! as fate would have it, the iCare cardiologist had an emergency saturday morning and didnt see anyone for consultation. sayang. i had to cancel the tests. I COULD HAVE SPENT THE UBER HOT WEEKEND IN GALERA!!!
o well.. no point in being a brat about it. :p
Saturday, April 14
whats on my menu?
since my fainting spell early thursday morning (april 5), ive been meaning to head to a neurologist for a check-up. so this morning, despite having less than 4 hours of sleep, mom and i went to see a neurologist and a cadriologist.
the neurologist says i need a work up for possible cardiogenic syncope (SING-kuh-pee).
say what?! hahaha. i looked it up and syncope is a medical term for fainting. (sosyal di ba?!) and fainting happens when the brain is not receiving enough blood and oxygen --- thus the temporary loss of consciousness. more specific to his initial findings: cardiogenic syncope is when the fainting is from the abnormal heart rhythms. but the bigger question was what caused me to "syncopate"? (hahaha.) initially he thinks it because i drank a granite with an espresso shot at max brenner at 5pm (an "upper") then a beer at 9pm (a "downer") and that may have caused my heart to skip some beats.. eventually leading to the fainting.
in any case, there isnt a final diagnosis yet.. but they do have to run several tests on me to help figure out the cause and to rule out any of the serious stuff (ie. seizures, heart conditions, etc.)
here's the list of tests i have to have done:
1. ECG
2. complete blood count
3. (some stuff i can read but has something to do with my blood)
4. 2D echo with DS
5. treadmill exercise
6. stress test
7. EEG
grabe. these are the tests done for my parents!!! and im having them done too! hahaha. whats not as funny though is that its SUUUUUPER expensive. parang gusto ko ulit himatayin sa mahal... except this time ill know the exact cause is. :p
but health is wealth.. its ironic that i have to make a huge dent on my savings. ouch ouch ouch. hopefully though the office HMO will approve and shoulder the costs. :D
i have a feeling this is far from over. after the tests have been done, ill know if i have to see any other specialists..
so the adventure continues...
the neurologist says i need a work up for possible cardiogenic syncope (SING-kuh-pee).
say what?! hahaha. i looked it up and syncope is a medical term for fainting. (sosyal di ba?!) and fainting happens when the brain is not receiving enough blood and oxygen --- thus the temporary loss of consciousness. more specific to his initial findings: cardiogenic syncope is when the fainting is from the abnormal heart rhythms. but the bigger question was what caused me to "syncopate"? (hahaha.) initially he thinks it because i drank a granite with an espresso shot at max brenner at 5pm (an "upper") then a beer at 9pm (a "downer") and that may have caused my heart to skip some beats.. eventually leading to the fainting.
in any case, there isnt a final diagnosis yet.. but they do have to run several tests on me to help figure out the cause and to rule out any of the serious stuff (ie. seizures, heart conditions, etc.)
here's the list of tests i have to have done:
1. ECG
2. complete blood count
3. (some stuff i can read but has something to do with my blood)
4. 2D echo with DS
5. treadmill exercise
6. stress test
7. EEG
grabe. these are the tests done for my parents!!! and im having them done too! hahaha. whats not as funny though is that its SUUUUUPER expensive. parang gusto ko ulit himatayin sa mahal... except this time ill know the exact cause is. :p
but health is wealth.. its ironic that i have to make a huge dent on my savings. ouch ouch ouch. hopefully though the office HMO will approve and shoulder the costs. :D
i have a feeling this is far from over. after the tests have been done, ill know if i have to see any other specialists..
so the adventure continues...
Thursday, April 12
Sunday, April 1
night out with the boys
i havent been out in a long time. my usual gimik would be hanging out at someone's house or at a nearby bar or your short dinner or movie then head home. but last night (or this morning rather) i found myself at the heart of mainstream nightlife.
it was supposed to be a laid back gimik at 310 along aguirre with some neighborhood friends since christian was leaving for denmark... i wasnt able to join them but they picked me up a little past midnight on their way to cuisine at the fort. ive never been there and it was fun.
by past 3am, the boys were ready to call it a night... BUT! i had to eat so we stopped by burger machine here in BF.
some photos with the boys:
it was supposed to be a laid back gimik at 310 along aguirre with some neighborhood friends since christian was leaving for denmark... i wasnt able to join them but they picked me up a little past midnight on their way to cuisine at the fort. ive never been there and it was fun.
by past 3am, the boys were ready to call it a night... BUT! i had to eat so we stopped by burger machine here in BF.
some photos with the boys:
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