everybody loves to love you...
but no one can love you the way that i do.

the end (no harry potter spoilers here)

i finished book 7 of harry potter today and i feel a bit sad knowing there wont be a next one. i remember when i first heard of harry potter, i had no idea who or what he/it was. they said it was a book about a young boy wizard but then i thought that it was nonesense for adults to take such a fancy for a children's book. then i got to read book 1... from then on, i was hooked.

i guess i cant say im one of the most avid fans since i do tend to forget what happened int he last book while reading the latest one available... and i seem to just remember bits and pieces of the movies... oh, and it takes effort to enumerate all 7 titles in correct order with certainty... but i was a fan, none the less. when im reading one of its books... or watching the movie, i get so involved. its funny. i think its one of the few things that can actually hold my undivided attention for hours on end! hahahaha. case in point: i was reading parts of book 7 here at the office, and literally i wouldnt realize people were talking to me already! not to mention lumampas ako sa bahay ko while reading it on my phone... hahahaha!

today is a sad day for me because there is no book 8 to look forward to. there are the movies, but theyre not quite the same. what's left is to read all 7 books one after the other! i bet it will be one great read again... things will make sense and i guess a different kind of exciting since i know what the end will be.

it was a great adventure.. thanks harry.

its done

i did it. there's no turning back from here. at least i hope there isnt. ive said what i was supposed to say... and what happens next will probably keep me awake the next few days.

i hope i dont create heart aches for myself from this.

vacation over

i had a great 4 days. i got to be dirt lazy and not care... but i still did. hahahaha. its nice not to have deadlines for a change. i had things i wanted to do, but i think i didnt get around to doing all of them on purpose just to emphasize that the four days was about doing what i want, when i want to.

friday, i got out of bed around lunch (saya!) then spent time with mom getting kikay with matching foot spa and facials. i emptied my coin bank and im happy to announce im now Php4,000.00 closer to saving my first million! haha.

saturday was spent mostly watching heroes... heard mass with mom and my brother too. sunday was heroes day too. grabe, nakaka-addict yung show. i didnt even realize it was 2am already! so i finished episode 1 yesterday... cant wait for the second volume!!!

then there's today. got around to cleaning my room a bit (saved my closet for next weekend). went to see dr rivera with mom too... this wasnt in my to-do list, but since mom was going and my knees have been bothering me.. might as well, right?

so its back to work tomorrow. im neutral about it.. neither looking forward to it but not dreading it.

GASSO anniv tomorrow!!!

after much delay... finally

im sneaking a 2-day leave this week --- friday and monday. yay!

my to-do list while on work break:

1. fix my body clock... ive been having a hard time sleeping at night and an even harder time waking up in the morning. hopefully by tuesday, i can manage to wake up my usual 630am again.

2. go to the dentist

3. clean op my closet... time to make space for more shopping. hahahaha!

4. watch Heroes... i cant wait!!!

red dot on white paper or white paper with a red dot?

people will choose to see things in a way that suits them best or in ways that are second nature to them. thats how people are built. thats how im built. so if people choose to see my flaws... my quirks... my bad habits, i cant blame them. because i do have flaws, quirks and bad habits and i should not have to apologize for them.

i choose to see the better things in this. i choose to see the people who see the good in me. i smile today because of the few who see the bigger me rather than seeing just a small part of me.

"we gossip because its fun. you gossip... i gossip. it just hurts when the gossip turns out to be about you" --- hilary duff

out with the old.. in with the new

i was fixing my clean laundry just a few minutes ago when i realized i was seriously running out of closet space! well, my closet aint that big to begin with cause i really dont have a lot of clothes, but to see it almost overflowing like that means only one thing... time to sort the out and dispose of some of my clothes. stressful. hahaha.

i wonder where all the clothes came from? i rarely go shopping nowadays and yesterday's shopping gig resulted in just 6 items to add to my closet. hmmm... something fishy is going on.

in any case, im a firm believer than for new energies to come into our lives, it is importatnt to regularly toss out the old stuff to make room for the new ones to come pouring in. similarly symbolic to the cutting of my hair. hahaha. (obvious bang i want to move on from certain things... im just itching to get rid of some really negative vibes!)

maybe next weekend ill be able to face the sorting of my clothes... i should remember to buy boxes this week --- throw, give away, sell, keep.

seven-seven-oh seven

tickle me!

spent the day with lily... shopping! hahaha. actually, i shopped, she kept me company. i swear, that girl has the highest EQ. hahaha. then agan, she's off to singapore and bangkok... so she shouldnt really buy stuff here muna.

i was so giddy about it that i was just two bags into my shopping but i was smiling ear to ear already. haha. retail therapy rocks!

next on my expense list is my hair. eeeeee! im excited already. hahaha. i love cutting my hair. its like im physically cutting off the things that have passed. medjo too much of a symbolism for a simple haircut, but i like to think of it that way. haha.

while waiting for my sister, lily and i got to talking about something ive been toying in im head for quite a while now. i think im going to go for it. ill be praying things fall into place as planned or even better than planned. i just needed that extra nudge from lily. fingers crossed!

so between the shopping and the exciting new plan, yesterday was G-R-E-A-T.

of climbing rats, dancing shoes, and more

climbing rats

i was waiting in line for the shuttle when i noticed some movement around 20 meters away... i thought they were kittens playing. to my surprise, they were 4 (or 5 maybe) rats playing outside that house.. PLAYING! they were swinging and jumping around on this shrub's flimsy stems ala tarzan and climbing the house's wall. as in a 7-foot wall... and they were climbing it... as in vertical climb. kinilabutan talaga ako. THERE'S NO ESCAPING THEM! they jump, they climb, they knaw on stuff. *shudder*

anyhow, i was a good distance from their frolicking so i was watching them for a good 5 minutes or so, when i realized.... THEY WERE RUNNUNG ON THE TREE BRANCHES OF THE TREE I WAS STANDING UNDER. i almost freaked out. there were 2 more playing tag on the branches. yuck. buti na lang the van came right at the time i saw and was ready to run all the way to makati.

MENTAL NOTE: bring umbrella next time i line up at banzon.

i want to dance

dancing is my ultimate release and i miss it. i miss the non-verbal expression... the release of energy and emotion... the sweat and the rush of it all. stumbled on thiis on kikay exchange and as i was watching her videos, i felt like i was ready to jump out of my seat and dance too... hahaha. that would have been a sight.



july 5

yesterday was a really tiring day. i spent the whole day cooped up in the 4As seminar at dusit. while i was happy at the thought of not being at the office and being unreachable by naggers, it kinda felt weird to be in the same seat for a whole work day.

i learned a lot during the seminar and im thoroughly thankful they sent me. but when the seminar ended at 530, the rain was pouring hard outside! tough luck for me.. i had to haul my ass to ABS-CBN to take a video-message of maricel soriano for the sales team. traffic and all, i got there. thanks to marj who kept me company and shielded me from her taray kilays.

i was done by 9pm. chumika rin ako ng slight kay marya and bec to remind myself i should be happy im not in showbiz. good thing hindi na umuulan at wala nang traffic sa edsa going back to makati. but my luck seems to be on vacation kasi unusually long ang pila sa shuttle going home! as in umiikot-ikot pa.

long story short, i was home by 11pm but weirdly enough was in a friendly and cheerful mood. pero pagod ang katawan... ng-O.

the ultimate taray

ive had my exposure to marya's taray... matched with mama bec and wyngard's own versions and i think i survived well. even if she totally killed me when she unleashed her taray in the halls of ABS... in front of kris aquino, no less. or when she first tried to assasinate me when she refused to wear the tvc wardrobe on the rated k guesting simply because she's worn it in public before. oh, and that day was extra bad because korina had to join in the "taray fest". pero makapal face ko.. deadma.

ive been surprised by chit ramos' sweetness which is total opposite of her reputation. i love that woman. even if forever nya ako nilalaglag about john prats. hahaha.

today, i meet face to face with the ultimate taray... ms. anabelle rama (im actually unsure if she's the ultimate taray or if lolit solis is... i think she might win it). hahahaha. we've been in touch over the phone the past days to coordinate for today's event but im honestly nervous about meeting her in person. baka sampalin ako for no reason at all! hahahaha.

im trying to focus na lang on meeting the gutierrez twins instead... at least i have something nice to look at. hahahaha.

nervous or not, its time to go! wish me luck!

someone please explain

i end up saying what i want to anyways... its true. even if i bite my tongue to keep myself from saying something, at some point in time... in one way or another, i always manage to say what i want. and im exercising that fact.

i hate playing games. and it seems that because i hate playing games, i tend to attract people who play nothing but games --- some even have the nerve of denying that they are in fact typical guys... typical players. i know there are lessons to be learned from all the shit... because life would not even bother putting me through it if there arent lessons to be learned, but right now, it just irritates the hell out of me. im sick of the games people play. im sick of being played with. im sick of sticking my head out... of holding on to hope that this time it might be different.

if there is a "match" for everyone out there... if the so-called balance in everything in this world does exist, then he's taking too much of his time getting here. why should i even bother?! i know the answer to that one... i bother because im still the sickly hopeless romantic that i naturally am. im just a little bruised and broken right now.

P.S. no cliche responses please. call me cynical.. call me negative, but ill be honest and say hearing cliches make me feel sick these days. they just dont make me feel better anymore.